Monday, February 18, 2013

How I Met Your Mother



Dear Boo and Bubble,

When I was a little older than you, one of my favorite things to do was sit with great granddaddy Schaefer and listen to him tell stories about how things used to be.  He could weave a tale for sure, never afraid to embellish the details just enough to embolden the story but not so much to make it untrue.  There was one, however, that he related without any enhancement ….the day he met your great grandmother Mary.  It needed no such prop because his sincerity in telling it rang through every time. 

As you know, he grew up in Greenville, and his best friend was Steve Stephenson (I mentioned this in the blog called A Debt Paid Forward).  When time came for college, Steve went to Washington and Lee in Virginia and granddaddy stayed home to attend Furman.

At the same time, your great grandmother Mary lived in Houston.  Her best friend in high school was Kitty Lawder.  As fate dictated, Kitty went off to Sweetbriar College in Virginia while Mamaw Mary stayed in Houston to go to Rice Institute.

Long story short, Kitty and Steve met in Virginia and couldn’t wait to introduce their two best friends.  On the occasion of Greek Week at W&L, they invited Schaefer and Mary to come to Virginia.  Mamaw Mary took the train from Houston to Greenville and from there, she accompanied Schaefer up to Virginia.

Granddaddy Schaefer always declared that he fell in love with Mamaw Mary at the first sight of her coming off the train.  He met her at the station with a corsage which brightly adorned her fancy dress complete with hat and gloves.  He snapped a picture of her at that very first moment.  The picture stayed on the table by his bed until he died.  They courted for four years long distance before marrying at the beginning of World War II in 1942. 

Ironically, some 35 years later, Kitty clandestinely introduced Captain to me.  She had wanted me to meet him for quite a while, but was afraid to set up a blind date on the pretense that it wouldn’t work.  Instead she hatched a plan to put us in the same place at the same time.  From there, we could size each other up and make the decision on our own.  I have to admit that I participated in the scheme. 

She told me that Captain lived next door to her son, Sam, in Columbia, SC.  They had just finished law school at the time and were studying for the bar exam.  Over that weekend, they decided to take a break and come to Greenville for some relaxation.  Here’s how it went.

Kitty told me she was going to call me when Sam and Captain arrived.  Then we would hang up the phone and in a few minutes I would call her back.  She would act like it was a spontaneous call and, after some overblown chit-chat, she would suggest that I come up to their house on Paris Mountain to join everybody in a swim.  Okay…the plot was set.

On that Saturday morning, the phone rang.  It was Kitty.  “They’re here!” she whispered emphatically into the phone.  “Okay,” I replied and hung up.   In a few minutes I called her, she invited me up, I drove up to Paris Mountain – and the rest is history, as they say.

As you get older, you’ll find that family stories are always fascinating, but none as much as how parents meet and fall in love enough to start a lifelong journey together. This is now and has always been true.  I’m closing with an entry found in your great, great, great, great grandfather’s journal about the first meeting of his parents, Thomas Cottrell and Susannah Daniels.  What makes this story so precious was that he was full-grown and she, four years old.

“My mother’s first acquaintance with my father was in this wise.  She was quite a young girl, and having a talent for singing, used to be persuaded to sing for the preachers, as they assembled at the houses of the neighbors.  On one occasion there was to be a sacramental meeting at my mother’s grandfather Louis’ (her mother’s father) and my father, though a Methodist, came, being the first to arrive.  It was common for him to assist the Presbyterians, with whom he was a favorite.  He stepped into the door, rather a young florid looking gentleman, dressed in full Methodist preacher style, and such as the bearing he had, that it was impossible for them to prevail on my mother, as usual, to sing.  The superior dignity of my father, had awed her into a silence which she could not break.

In the pulpit, during the meeting, she was not pleased with him.  A peculiar shaking of the head was displeasing to her.  This was in Greenville County, NC.  She was about 4 years old.  The song she used to sing much to the delight of preachers & friends was

“My Hope, My All, My Saviour Thou…etc.”

She recollected never to have seen him anymore till she was about 19 years of age.  This I get from my mother’s own lips.”

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